In case you haven’t figured it out yet, I’m not only passionate about adoption but have a very special place in my heart for open adoption. We love Abigail and Bennett’s birth mom! And, we always want to make sure she knows just how special she is to us. In honor of Mother’s Day and open adoption, and mostly in honor of her, I’ve decided to share the letter I’m sending her. I hope it encourages hopeful adoptive moms as well as expresses the beauty that can be found in adoption, and particularly in open adoption.
As I celebrate my first Mother’s Day as a mom of two, you keep coming to my mind. Last Mother’s Day, my first, I never imagined I’d be celebrating this Mother’s Day with another baby in my arms. We were just so thrilled to have beautiful little Abigail. We didn’t even have the capacity to imagine a bigger family a year later.
Words can’t express the emotions when we first saw your email asking if we’d be open to adopting again! And, then having you invite us to be a part of the ultrasound and learn the gender together. That was truly a once in a lifetime experience! Then, choosing names and making your name part of his! That was such a joy for us!
We will never ever forget the morning we got the text from you that he was on the way! Wow! And, before we could even make it to the hospital, he arrived! And, seeing him for the first time! It’s hard to believe all of this was only 3 1/2 months ago.
I just wanted to let you know, on this Mother’s Day, that you fulfilled a dream we didn’t even know we had! We never imagined we’d have a perfect little girl and boy! And, we definitely never imagined we’d have the honor and privilege of Abigail knowing and growing up with her full biological sibling. This isn’t just a gift you gave to Benson and I. It’s an incredible blessing to Abigail that she will one day understand. The same goes for Bennett!
I’m thinking of you and the hard choice you made- twice. I’m thinking about the judgement you said you’ve faced and how badly I wish I could help those people understand that what you did was not careless or selfish. It was amazing and selfless. And, I’m guessing probably the hardest decision you’ve made in your entire life, and maybe ever will.
We want you to know that our hearts are so full of love and gratefulness for you in choosing to give our son and daughter life! And, for choosing us to have the blessing of being their parents. That’s a decision you made! Someone else could be their parents but because of you, we are! We can’t wait until Abigail and Bennett are old enough to hear their story, and learn about you, and how much love you showed to them as well as us.
If you could see how much they are loved you’d have even more reassurance of your decision. Aunts, Uncles, Grandparents, Nieces, Nephews, friends and even strangers have absolutely fallen in love with them. They are so very loved by our family, church and friends.
We can’t imagine our lives without them and we love you so very much for blessing us with them. And, we feel very blessed to have you in our lives! We had no idea what to expect with open adoption but now that we get to communicate with you regularly, we can’t imagine it being any other way!
I’m praying for you on this Mother’s Day and please know that you are in our thoughts and prayers every day. We look in Abigail and Bennett’s eyes, see you, and remember how blessed we are!
We are looking forward to seeing you in two weeks!
Happy Mother’s Day!